The Best Policy

"Giving Robert Lowell any kind of poetry prize is obscene. Ditto worrying about Ezra Pound. And the Yale Poetry series. The colleges are meant to kill. Four years in which to kill you. And if you don't extend your stay, the draft, by and for old people, waits to kill you. Kill your instincts, your love, the music. The music is the only live, living thing. Draft only those over forty. It's their war, let them kill each other." - The View From the Bandstand

I just like anything that condemns college because I fucked it up so badly. Everyone else I know has got involved with the experience and it has taught them. I tried, but sporadically, not hard enough, I let myself give up far too easily. But it's not too late. I won't say I don't care because I really do. And just because I hate myself now and all the trite shit I come out with anytime I try, and the fact that I can't write, paint, draw (I can decorate) doesn't mean it will always be so. I'm ready to try when I'm so lost there's nothing to lose. I'm ready to be inspired and not call it all a crock of shit because I'm jealous or too lazy to understand. I might be ready to be in the world and not lie anymore, because if i'm not I will completely become something I hate. So i'm ready to be honest.